“Our Admiral Nurse knew all the right things to say”
Things got really difficult that summer. We went on holiday with our daughter, and after being with her dad for a week, under the same roof, she could see the deterioration. She told me we couldn’t go on living like that.
When we got back, Rachel arranged for us to talk to a social worker to fix up some respite. Peter was angry but Rachel knew all the right things to say, and with her persuasion, he grudgingly accepted.
On the day, Rachel had to come and physically take Peter to the dementia facility. I heard her helping him putting his shoes on, saying, “Can I help you, flower?” He angrily retorted, “I’m not your flower!” She asked him what he would like her to call him, and he said, “Sir” – and from then on, she did.
Peter seemed to enjoy his week in respite, although it was clear he didn’t have a clue what was going on. But when he spent a second week there, he attacked two of the carers. The psychiatrist who was sent to assess him said, “Susan, I’m struggling – he’s presenting so well.” That was what he was capable of doing.